i forgot shoutouts for a few of the most important people whom i met during my learning journey and im really sorry to all of you. i regret all my actions and all the hurtful words i ever said, im truly sorry. i hope to gain your forgiveness and understanding. i doubt you will see these. just treat it as im talking to myself. i know these are late by a year but i didnt have the courage in the past although nobody ever sees my blog. but perhaps one day, one of you might feel like popping into my blog and perhaps see these.yeah. but i shall cross my fingers that all of you will never ever see these as i still dont dare to face you all.

shoutouts to ex-RAINBOWERS

zhuwei: i really thank you for all that you've done and thank you so much for putting up with me and understanding me. so sorry that i made you cry! i really am! :( but we're still friends! and i'll continue to see you at library! <3 you!

shujie: my gosh! you taught me so many things and i really had fun going out with you in the past! and we had so much fun talking and thanks for standing by my side those months when i needed help. thanks! i love you so!

sermin: i wasnt angry with you giving out my cookies! i was just faking! but i dont think you ever knew that! but i appreciate your sorry note! and you are really nice and you helped all of us manage our emotions better, although sometimes they didnt work but thanks anyway!

claudice: im so sorry i wasnt able to help you in any way when you were in your darkest times! i only add oil to the fire.. so sorry. but we had fun causing so much noise and laughing at each others weird stints. so sorry that i neglected you most of the time.. sorry..

meizhen: we werent very close but im sorry if i gave you the thought that im stealing your best friend. your best friend will always be your best friend and i will never be able to take her away from you. no matter how much i like her, no matter how nice i am to her, i will never be as close to her as both of you are. i hope you get the point. your bestie is a really great friend and you have to appreciate her and not take her for granted.

lingli: im really sorry that i kept daoing you on and off. i had my own personal reasons that i cannot explain on my blog since it's open to the world. i just felt like i should let both of you stay in the picture and not stick my head in. hahs. i almost broke down at that period of time and i knew i had to make a decision. i know my decision might seem wrong to you. but i cant turn the clock back and make the decision all over again. i treasure you as a friend and the times we had together, i will always remember. love you loads!

to make these shoutouts, i pried open my heart and took out 3/4 of the contents. 1/2 is for my friendships, the other my family. the other 1/4 of my friendships will be kept till someone ask about it. which i hope they wont. the wounds havent healed fully yet. so i shall cross my fingers once again.